Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Long-ass depressing tirade.


Wow. so, my apologies for not updating yesterday, I was in a bit of a recovery mode (a long enough story I'm not gonna tell here - let's just say I can't run for a few days and wearing a tuxedo usually results in trouble for me). Needless to say, the wedding was spectacular and if was good to see some old friends and make plans with new ones. Anyways, I had a nice little day off, staying in and getting overdue stuff done around the house, finishing my book (it ended a little bit weaker than I'd have liked), and watching the sequel to one of my favorite movies of the decade, Battle Royale.
Battle Royale II: Requiem is a movie I've been meaning to catch for about 2 years aince I found out it existed. It might be a little bit more bloody than the first one, and definitely harbors a lot of (perceived) anti-American and adult behavior. Being both an American and (ostensibly) an adult, it probably gave me more to think about than it should've. It is a lot more peaceful than the first though, and offers many more meditative scenes in which you have these teenagers pondering their imminent death and how they choose to accept it.
It sort of coincided with a story I was reading about Japanese suicides and how in the 1930s, following a young schoolgirl's perilous leap, 1,207 people jumped into the molten crater of a volcano (Mount Mihara, pictured above) on the small island of Oshima. It got to be so bad that the train company ceased selling one-way tickets to the island, and later erected a fence to keep people from jumping. 1,207 people. That devastated me just thinking about it. Thinking of the parents, children, families and friends of that many people having to cope with the loss of a loved one, just absolutely terrified me. At first I thought it was just a cultural thing, recalling the Aokigahara "Black Forest" at the foot of Mt. Fuji, which has become a popular place for ritual suicide after being described as the "perfect place" in some retarded suicide manual that was published almost a decade ago. It is a beautiful place, judging by the photos I've seen, and the legends of mythical creatures, demons, and mineral ore that renders compasses useless (imagine Lost where they manage to find more fucking bodies) probably make it seem more attractive. But seriously, the thought of hiking through this gorgeous, supposedly enchanted forest only to be stopped every 30 feet or so by signs reminding you not to kill yourself is just depressing.
Oddly, it turns out that about 1200 people have jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge over time as well (there's a very interesting, albeit morbid article from the New Yorker here). Anyway, it's just astounding numbers that I woke up thinking about this morning (uplifting, right?). Suicide has touched my life in several ways, and none of them have been positive. I don't feel like any of my friends feel any differently about this, and I think anyone who's had any sort of experience with it can agree that it just makes those you love feel devastated and impotent. The reason I got to this was a scene in the movie yesterday (yes, I do sometimes take profound philosophical statements from Japanese action/gore movies). where they're showing amontage of children in Afghanistan, kids who've known nothing but shit blowing up and death in every corner of their short lives, and yet they're still smiling for the camera, waving and living their lives like children. It was heartwrenching. To compare that with the stuff that constitutes self-crisis here just makes you want to run a steak knife into your gums. ouch, that hurt me even to think up. The point is, quick fucking whining. You don't like your life, then do something about it. Believe it or not, you have that power. Unless, of course, you're one of the prisoners at Guantanamo, at which point I apologize. Those people have nothing they can do. and to the asshole State Department spokesperson who called their deaths a "PR stunt", fucking insensitive clod, what the fuck do you think that's going to accomplish? Some of these people have been held without charge since they were minors. Have some fucking dignity or, better yet, try to restore some to this country's word. FUCK.
Okay, I'm all deathed out for awhile, I promise. Again, I'm sorry to be going on about this for so long, it's just what happens when given 3 days to go on about it. So here's 3 songs about death that aren't nearly as depressing as the shit I just wrote. But at least we learned something, right? Well, I learned something. This rant was mostly brought onby the combinations of media I've been sitting through in the last few days (Nick Drake is on the radio right now. Thanks, XPN), and I've been thinking too much today not to address it.

The Deadly Snakes are a band from Toronto who have consistently rocked my shit for a couple of years now. Their album Ode to Joy is the sort of album you buy and listen to on end like 100 times in a row. It's basically got the same white-boy assault on soul music that the Delta 72 had, but with an earnest quality and sense of panic-stricken enjoyment that Gregg Foreman couldn't fake in a hundred years. Their live shows are supposed to be riotous fun, though unfortunately they rarely travel to my neck of the woods and the last time they were supposed to play they went and cancelled due to a snowstorm. What kind of Canadians blame snow? Anyways, this was the song that made me love this band.

"I Want to Die" - The Deadly Snakes

Buy Ode to Joy here
Here's "Gore Veil" from the latest album "Porcella" from their label's website, too.

Air. Jeffrey Eugenides' The Virgin Suicides. Sophia Coppola. Seriously what else am i going to tell you about these things. Seriously though, read the book. It makes a great movie seem shitty.

"Dead Bodies" - Air
Buy the Virgin Suicides Soundtrack here

Gary Floyd used to front a punk band called The Dicks for awhile, and outside of this incredible song from Trikont's Dead & Gone series (arguably my favorite compilations of all time, from artwork to song selection they are just so well put together) I can't find anything from his solo career (this was included on an album of his 3 years after it appeared here). This song is freakishly upbeat considering the lyrics, although the children singing has some sort of Children of the Corn vibe i can't put my finger on.

"Moving From the Dark Into the Light" - Gary Floyd
Buy Dead & Gone #2: Totenleider - Songs of Death here

Anyways, I hope everythings well on your end. I promise I'll be back with songs about T&A or something tomorrow.

1 comment:

David Goodman said...

i'm dying to hear what happened to you.... vm from the lady in the AM saying you were MIA... call you later.