Tony Snow is a fat-headed sack of shit.

To quote Jim Anchower, it’s been awhile since I rapped at ya. Well, half of that you can blame on the crippling hangover that was handed to me courtesy of the Hold Steady (seriously, it was a long, long night), and the other half you can hold Blogger squarely responsible for. I know I do. Anyway, It’s been a rough couple of days here at work, and the weekend approaching looks like it might be more stressful than the last 3 combined. We’ll see, and I’ll be sure to post whether or not I’ve made it out alive.

I was gonna make this long tireade here about this new terror threat, and how I still don’t think everything adds up. There are too many might haves and allegedlys in this story for me to put all of my faith into things. The timing just seems way too ripe for all of this, and there still hasn’t been any facts presented in this case. I’m sure something was happening, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it was some sort of terrorist plot, but guess what, that’s happening all over the world right now. You know what’s gonna make it worse? Killing more people. I’m glad that Tony Blair’s approval rating is back up, and that Tony Snow’s dickhole comments and Dick Cheney’s eerily prophetic conference call and all, but doesn’t all of this seem like it’s such an easy distraction from continued violence in Iraq, not to mention the shitstorm that is Lebanon right now?
It doesn’t matter what I say, because of the 9 people that read this, I’m reasonably sure that none is a head of state. Or an oil baron. For all I know, this page will be found by aliens sifting through the ashes of our once fertile culture, after they’ve started emulating old Gene Vincene and Elvis records. It’s just disgusting to me that I or anyone should actually try to plead with people in this modern age not to fucking murder people. It should be so easy to assume that we as a species have grown beyond that. Well, we haven’t. and I know it’s not our fault most of the time, and that sometimes other people attack you first. That’s the breaks. Fucking move on with your life. We shouldn’t be worrying so much on how to prevent another attack (here it comes………………..they’ll find another way), but maybe WHY they want to attack us. Maybe pursuing the domino theory that got is into Vietnam wasn’t the best idea. Maybe giving weapons to half the planet instead of food to the whole planet would’ve been a pretty keen idea. Shit, at least we’d save a lot of money. Maybe then most of my friends could afford to go to the doctor. The way that things are on this planet, it’s enough to kill a man. Or several hundred million.

But I didn’t wanna talk about that today. As one of my coworkers said earlier when we were talking about the BP scandal, “but you know what? It is a beautiful day.” And it is. I went and bought 2 new pairs of shoes last night, which I’ve actually never done before. It was strange, though, because as I was waiting in line to be rung up and realized that I was getting ready to buy 2 pairs of brown sneakers. Furthermore, I already have 2 pairs of brown sneakers at home. What the hell is wrong with me? I used to wear the most obnoxious clothing known to man (just ask my parents. One year, as I was opening up a christmas gift, they beamed from behinf the torn up wrapping paper and my mom said “it was the ugliest sweater we coulf find, so we figured you’d love it”. And I did). Now, I’m all browns and greens. I don’t blare music from my workspace anymore, I don’t even have any bumber stickers on my car anymore –exception: “Vulcans do it logically”. Thanks for that, Sean. So what can account for this? To what can I attribute my disappearing personality? Communization? That’s what I was initially afraid of, at first. But then I realized I’m just as much a loudmouth jerk as I always was. If anything I’ve gotten worse. And then I realized that it’s because I came to understand that personality, who you are, isn’t something so superficial as what bands you’re listening to, or how hopelessly mismatched your outfit is. It’s something far more subtle, that runs much, much deeper than whatever shit we all used to try on to convince ourselves of who we are. If someone can’t discern who and what you are, if someone can’t see past your hair or shoes to see what makes you an interesting person, a person as unique as any other asshole, then fuck them. They’re not worth it. Thos most ostentatious are always the most bland and worthless in a conversation. You don’t need that, trust me. Okay, my soapbox has a few holes in it, I should step down. It’s just something I was pondering as I was listening to the crickets in bed last night. You should really try it sometime.

Oh, and just so you know I put one of the pairs back and got a pair of black and bright green ones. You know, for when I wanna feel like a jerk.

So for today’s music are some songs from one of my favorite albums of the last decade. The Exploding Hearts put this out in 2001 or 2, but it’s tied directly into the punk/new wave sounds of the early 80s. They sing pop songs about falling in love and being a dumb kid. When I first heard them I was shocked at how much of a throwback sound they had while still maintaining everything that was fun and fresh and exciting about a band like the Rezillos or the Buzzcocks 25-30 years ago. Unfortunately, all but one of them were killed in a van crash a little over 3 years ago, right as they were poised to start touring the country for the first time. It was a damned shame. Anyways, Terry six has a new band, The Nice Boys, who can be heard here. Thanks for that, Shiv.

“Modern Kicks” – The Exploding Hearts

“Rumours in Town”– The Exploding Hearts.

Buy Guitar Romantic here.

I know next to nothing about Andrw Vincent and the Pirates, other than they’re from Ottowa, and their album is just as fun as the one listed above. It’s good for riding in a boat, for what it’s worth.

“One, Two, Three” – Andrew Vincent & The Pirates

“I Love the…” – Andrew Vincent & the Pirates

Buy I Love the Modern Way here.

Well, that’s it, gang. NO WAIT. I totally forgot. Go listen to a fan-fucking-tastic conversation between Jeff Garlin from Curb Your Enthusiasm and the freakishly brilliant and always hilarious Patton Oswalt. It’s about an hour and a half, but I promise you’ll laugh hard at least 8 times throughout. You know what, fuck it, I’ll even say 9. Thanks to the Hammer Museum for hosting it. Download it here.

Now, though, I’m outta here. I gotta run home, take back a shitload of cable to best buy, and then hop on I-95 for some good-time old fashioned summer weekend traffic. Everybody have a good one. With any luck I’ll tell my Lamborghini story when I get back.