Friday, January 16, 2009

Location: The "ghetto" grocery store, which to me is more of a Sanitarium with slightly fresher produce than a ghetto, but what do I know.

Time: approx: 1:45 PM today

I'm looking through the fruit, trying to select myself some good apples (so long, scurvy!) when I hear a guy whistling. Apparently, several people hear him whistling, because a few cellow customers also look up at the same time. Which in itself isn't that big a deal. People whistle in public all the time, no big deal.
But he is whistling "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer". Which of course causes the stares to linger a bit longer, intent on figuring out just what the hell is going on*. Well, the guy gets to the "you would even say it glows" part before looking around and realizing that he's getting stared at.
Now, the look on his face is priceless enough. That "oh shit, was I doing that out loud?" type of face. But he goes and does it one better by stopping for a split second, then trying to WHISTLE HIS WAY OUT OF THIS MESS! He starts changing up the tune, as if he was singing some other song that just happened to have the same opening 8 bars or whatever as the one of the most famous songs in the world and it's your damned fault for not already knowing this lost classic.
Well, being an overgrown child I start laughing hysterically, looking around to see if everyone else caught that, but they're all looking at my with a slightly more concerned expression than they just sized that guy up with. The guy, meanwhile, has walked off somewhere else and left me holding the crazy bag.

This is waaaaay too common an occurrence for me.


*Now I'm not one of those people that freak out about this sort of thing. In a given year, I'm stopped at least 10 times between January and October and told that I'm wearing "Christmas colors", and forgo the explanation that I just like red and green. I've been known to blast "Sweet Baby Boy" by James Brown or "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" throughout the year without discomfort. But I think it's common courtesy to lay off the Christmas songs for at least 2 months after the holiday is over. Maybe reserve them only for the holiday season and a possible Christmas in July? Don't look at me for answers, that's your call.

2 comments:

sarah said...

excellent.

lorna said...

i miss ya, crazy.